First Rate Version of Me

Ok… so I have been tagged yet again by lovely Alya apres my first tagging by the equally lovely Foxy Brown  I mean Lauren

I have tried to fight the power but…  HELL.

The Rules:

1. Link the person who tagged you.
2. Mention the rules in your blog.
3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged bloggers’ blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged.

Unspectacular Quirks

1) I will spend my last dollar on a hot pair of shoes and call my friends begging them to feed me until I get paid again… *sigh at this just happening…again*

2) My exboyfriend is engaged just 4 weeks after asking me to marry him (and me saying NO THANKS!)

3) I have had 3 separate blogs shut down because outsiders (people I know in real life) found them and made a royal stink.

4) I studied tap, jazz and ballet from 3 -12.

5) I want the gun from Harlem Nights… the little one that Jasmine Guy had.

And now I have to tag people, eh?

I refuse to do it. So HA HAHAHAHAHAH HA HA AH HA!

I am a rebel.

*sigh*

I hate my job.

No… I hate the job I’m doing.

I guess I should be happy that I have a job. A few months ago I was on the verge of having a nervous breakdown because I had left my perfect job at a medium sized company, for a okay job at a fortune 400 company… only to find out that the department had “too many resources”.

So now instead of doing the job I was hired to do I am doing “departmental support”. What is “departmental support”, you might ask? Take the most mind-numbing thing you have done at work ALL YEAR, and multiply it by 8 hours a day, 5 hours a week. Then multiply that by 357… that’s “departmental support”

I was going to stab myself in the eye with my pencil a few weeks back when God sent me manna from heaven.

Cue the singing naked babies with harps.

Due to the limitations of my illegal cable box I do not get Showtime. So something (from heaven) told me to search on youtube to see if I could find season 5 clips of one of my favorite shows the L.Word. And lo and behold…

Cue the singing naked babies with harps.

I not only found clips but the whole freaking season!

So I happily watched the whole season of the L.word two weeks ago, trying my best not to laugh or gasp too loudly. And whether you  believe it or not, I am actually more productive

You have no idea how much time it takes to think of ways to hurt yourself and receive workers compensations without raising suspicion.

Since my intial revelation I have watched

Sanfor.dandSon

Gossip.Girls

and select movies

Fif.tyFirstDates

ACinderella.Movie

Mean.Girls

So here’s to you yuotube! Cheers!

Ok… so I didn’t get a chance to write the post about my weekend (two weekends ago) because

a) my life has been crazy the last few days and

b) it is hard to put last weekend into words.

I am pretty excited because I am going to an Estelle (who I have honestly never heard of) and John Legend (who I just adore) concert tomorrow. Want to know the best part?

Wait for it….

Wait for it….

The tickets were only 14.99 USD. When was the last time you paid 14.99 for a concert? Even the local “celeb-bands” are starting to charge more than that for a 2 set “concert” in the local grunge bar. That plus I am going with some actual musicians who will enjoy the whole process…. so it should be cool.

On to not so fab news…

Tonight I have to talk to the young soror I mentioned in my last post about her reputation. It seems like everyday a new escapade is being brought to light. At first I tried to think that they weren’t true but…. they are. She is sleeping with frat all over the state and it is really starting to make our chapter look bad. I’m not exactly sure how to tell her that one of the men she is sleeping with has a live-in girlfriend and a two month old baby….

I don’t know how she will react. I don’t know how I would react….

*Sigh* This is not going to go well.

~FRM

Yes I am going to write a post about my weekend.

No this isn’t it.

Maybe it was spawned from this weekend..

Maybe not the best thing to say.

So….. is better to be an in-charge whore or a sloppy-drunk slut?

We all (or is it just me?) have friends that fit in one (or both) of these categories.

I have a young soror, Five, who is really open about hers (literally). She opens her cooch (too much) and her mouth about her cooch (too much) with ease. I can tell you about 4 or 5 frat that she slept with. Not because I am nosy, (and yes I am nosy). But because it is common knowledge.

Now contrast that with the girl at the club who gets “extra-drunk” and ends up sleeping with the guy closest to her at the bar.

Who wins the “foolishness award”?

Then to take a step further….. who is smarter a prostitute who receives money for her cooch or a girl who gives it away for free?

Discuss amongst yourselves…

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

A LOOOOONG post will be just around the corner.

So here are a few comments I tried to post unsuccessfully.

Lonely Girl, Lonely and Blue by NotSoJenny

“Two words: KNOTB Sleepover”

Things That Make You Go Hmmm… by Lauren

“LMAO and Thank you for pointing out the 3rd black person in that picture. I was really confused for a moment.

And I love Real Housewives… I can’t seem to catch it tho”

Home Dysfunctional Home by Damsel in Distress

“My african-american family is equally annoying (and cute..bleh) without promises of lap tops or IPODs… wanna trade?”

Feel free to read these comment worthy posts…

Thank you and good night.

What is wrong with me?

I can’t figure out why I don’t like BANKER… but I don’t like BANKER.

He is so pretentious and pompous and BORING. All he wants to talk about is politics and current events and school.

I love an educated well-rounded man but there is more too life than that. I dread talking to him because I know I am going to lose interest.

Add that to the fact that I cringed at the thought of kissing him… I do believe this “relationship” is hearing the death knoll before it has even gotten off the ground.

Maybe I should try to make myself like him. I swear he is the kind of guy that I will look back on in 10 years and say “Why didn’t I give him a chance?” Oh well.

I am too young to settle…. so unless something happens out of the ordinary…. Adieu BANKER.

[enter apologies and random excuses for not blogging this week here]

So the funniest thing happened the other day,I was coming home from hanging out with my girls…  

Interestingly enough, One of my “girls” is the girl I was talking mad ish about earlier…. go figure.

I was going pretty fast because I was low on petrol. I kept having visions of running out of gas, in a dress that left not enough to the imagination, in the dark.

[Insert images of vagabonds ravishing my body and stealing my car]

Did I say vagabonds?… *scrolling up*…. Yes I did.

I started to slow down and loosen up as I approached the final toll before my house. That was until I glanced up at my rear view mirror to see some jerk-off speeding up from behind in order to cut in front of me.

Umm… not so much sweetheart.

So I floored it and stopped just short of hitting the car in front of me.

Can you imagine if I had hit that car? …. Lord that would have been a whoooolllle other post.

So I pulled up to the toll booth, feeling a little pumped that Mr. Jerk-off was relegated to waiting behind me. So what did I do?

“Here is the toll for me and the car behind me. Can you please tell him I said “You’re welcome.”

I am faster than you, I am classier than you, and I have money to burn. BASTID!

I kept it moving because my exit was the next one. I saw him (or who I thought was him) speeding past as I was getting off my exit. I am sure he was trying to catch up to his mystery patron to give them the bird oh well.

SOOOOO….. I ran out of gas on the way to work the next day. Well ACTUALLY I ran out of gas as soon as I passed the gate onto the compound.

Yes the gate that all 7500 employees go through…

Yes YARD MAN who told me his name was Chuck a hundred times had to come and bring me gas….

Yes I made up a name and a position and a floor…

Yes I had to sit there and listen to him tell me how he was saving lives  by making sure the palm fronds didn’t fall…

Yes I have been trying to creep in the parking lot trying to make sure I didn’t him again…

AND HELL YES I should have put that 1.25 in my gas tank and stopped trying to be Miss Tokyo Drift.

 YES WE CAN!

~FRM